Sunday, May 18, 2008

Just Go Walk It Off

So we were grocery shopping at Walmart today when Joel (10) began not feeling so well. Not a big deal, just a trip to the bathroom along with "My stomach just hurts a little." Upon returning home, he went upstairs to change his clothes and take it easy.

About 25 minutes later, he came downstairs announcing he'd made a list of what could be wrong with him and what he was feeling. "You need to look at this and decide what you think is wrong with me."

Now, you just have to know Joel to know that this isn't at all out of character for him. His mind is buzzing 24 hours per day, 7 days per week. We will often go past his room hours past his bedtime only to find his light on, and him sitting at his desk planning something out, building something, working on something.

When he was two years old, he said to me, "Mommy, I have a lot of ideas in my head." Oh, if we had only known then how prophetic that statement was. I thought it was cute. Oh silly, silly woman.

The. child. never. stops. thinking. And secondly, he never stops taking action to fulfill all those ideas.

Back to the issue at hand. He's made a list to help me with the diagnosis. Here is the list.

In case you can't read it, it says:


2. constapation
3. cold
4. flu

1. constapation
2. headache
3. stomachache
4. hiccups
5. breathing problems
6. chestache
7. internal bleeding

When he reads the list to me, he chuckles and says, "Ha - that last one's a joke." Really?? Oh - and I think you left out PARANOIA.

Being the compassionate and nurturing mother that I am, I looked at him and said, "Good golly, Joel. Sometimes people just don't feel good because they don't feel good. Go lay down and watch some SpongeBob."

After he walked away, Sean said, "What'd he do, go get on WebMD?!"

Later with the Zipps (neighbors), we went over the possibilities of typhoid fever, malaria, and bird flu as well. You have to cover all of your bases in this litigation-happy world, you know. And you can never be too thorough.

So I guess my discharge orders were helpful, because half an hour later he was out playing Indiana Jones with the neighborhood kids.

I think Grey's Anatomy may be missing a character - Dr. McHypochondriac.

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