Today is World Kindness Day. I think every day should be a celebration of being kind; but alas, it is not.
I have a naturally biting personality for some reason, and I have to work against this a lot. I'm sarcastic, prone to judging people, and can be taken down easily by small situations - situations that are manageable for others. I'm better now than I used to be, but it's because I am constantly aware of what I'm feeling and work to turn it around.
I do not have a hard time being kind to people that I run into. In fact, I try to teach my kids to engage everyday folks that they come in contact with in conversation just to show that they care how their day is going. But honestly, being truly and genuinely compassionate and kind is something I really consciously have to work on. My own emotional inadequacies often hinder this.
My genes are twisted around somewhere, somehow - because my mom is genuinely compassionate and built an entire life as a nurse on this quality. She really inserted herself into the lives of her patients, and they absolutely loved her for it. She cared for them above and beyond what the job required.
Well, let me back up a bit. It's not that I don't feel it, I just often have a hard time expressing it. Ask Sean and he'll tell you about my "bleeding heart" issue. My heart often aches for things when others couldn't care less. I'm always wanting to take people - and animals - in. I feel sorry for people for a number of weird and probably uncalled-for reasons.
But when it's time to express it, I always think the same thing, "Who in the world am I?" I often feel like I would be looked upon as an idiot; like people will wonder why in the world I think I have anything to offer.
Twisted, I know. I suppose true kindness and compassion can be shown in many ways and perhaps I'm not as damaged as I think.
I did actually tell Sean once a few years ago that I wish I could have a job where I just make people's days better. I love the small things that brighten people's spirits. Ya think there's a career in that somewhere? And do you think my experience in the cutting world of advertising and my journalism degree will even matter in that search?
It sounds like I have a future as a Walmart greeter. Though I need to put on about 30 years to qualify for that position.
Happy World Kindness Day! Go be nice to someone for no reason.