Monday, April 20, 2009

Get Back Up!

Today my house is a complete disaster, as it always is on Monday after a weekend of All-Boy Trashfest. This does not make me want to get busy. It makes me want to go work out, spend the day at a crowded amusement park waiting in lines, or offer to do all my friends' laundry - all things I would never do if I had free time.

The sun is trying so hard to come out to motivate me, and my dog keeps licking my toes as if to say, "Come on - I know you can do it!"

I get caught up - in life, in circumstances, in struggles, in the little things that seem big at the time. Sometimes they really are big and warrant getting stuck. Other times not so much.

I'm easily overwhelmed, and anyone who knows me well at all is acutely aware of this. However, they say they see a side of me that I am blind to - a stronger side, a side that is not as easily knocked down as I think. I must be too close to these situations, because all I feel much of the time is two steps behind and wondering what to do next. And I'm tired of being that person.

Most of this is tied to being a special needs parent. It drains you of much of your energy, both physical and emotional, and you are left with little to deal with the normal, everyday things that still must be done. Things like meal planning, dusting, laundry, and picking up. This may sound trivial, but it becomes a huge problem.

Tack on top of that the guilt that is felt when you feel you are stumbling spiritually, and things within this mama can spiral downhill quickly.

Music motivates and moves me greatly, and you all know how much I love Third Day. This particular song often gets me back on track, with the second verse (lyrics below) hitting very close to home.

I'm feeling better already. Enjoy!

Having faith in the long run is easier said than done
It's hard to live out in the light of day
You're bruised and you're battered, your dreams have been shattered
Your best laid plans scattered over the place

Despite all your tendencies, God sees it differently
Your struggle's a time to grow
And you, you're a miracle, anything but typical
It's time for the whole wide world to know

Keep on, keep on shinin'
Wherever you may be
Keep on, keep on shinin'
For all the world to see ...

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